Ego's a dirty word
By Jim Bright | smh.com.au | 16 January
A bit of modesty can tip the scales in your favour, writes Jim Bright.
How is your ego today? Are you cultivating your ego properly?
Instinctively many of us recoil at conscious consideration of ego, because it seems, well, egotistical to do so.
David Marcum and Steven Smith, a pair of management consultants who wrote Egonomics (published by Fireside), have no such qualms - they believe egos are our greatest asset but also our most expensive liability.
It seems our egos can be expensive to maintain. Consider the work of Roy Baumeister from Florida State University.
He asked participants in a study to bid to win $1. They could bid up to $5 to get the dollar. Surely nobody would be so stupid.
But it turns out they are that stupid when their egos are under threat. Some of the participants were told: "If you're the kind of person who usually chokes under pressure, or you don't think you have what it takes to win the money, then you might want to play it safe.
But it's up to you." They bid $3.71 on average to get the dollar and to prove they had what it takes.
Baumeister links this to career behaviour. He says the ego-threatened "get locked into uncompromising career choices". Supervisors can become overcommitted to employees of whom they had expressed a favourable opinion in hiring decisions.
On the other hand, Marcum and Smith contend that insufficient ego can lead to insecurity, apathy, fear and a lack of ambition. So some ego is good for career success but keeping it in check is the key.
So what are the warning signs that the ego may be getting out of control? Marcum and Smith identify four broad signs.
The first is "being comparative" - worrying overly about what others are doing. Sometimes we can become so obsessed with the accomplishments of a colleague that we become totally dissatisfied with our own.
The singer Morrissey makes this point in his song We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful.
Sometimes the ego-drive to compete is so intense we embark on an endeavour not due to some well-thought-out intention, rather because we want to show the world we can do it better than someone else. This can take us fatally off-trail.
Defensiveness is the second warning sign. The egotist is more concerned with defending themselves than considering the merits of the situation.
The most important thing is to be seen to be in the right, regardless of what is at stake. This means feedback falls on deaf ears and with it any possibility of learning or personal development.
Showcasing brilliance is the third warning sign, otherwise known as showing off or being up yourself. Marcum and Smith note that to achieve this state continually, it is necessary to believe you know all that is worth knowing and hence, once again, learning is no longer necessary.
Finally, seeking acceptance is a warning sign for the ego. If we become so concerned to protect a fragile ego by wanting to be liked, we end up saying whatever people want to hear, or failing to take risks, or being susceptible to insincerity.
So in answer to a question from Jenni in Hawthorn, if you are worried you may be working with an egomaniac, perhaps you could measure your colleague against Marcum and Smith's warning signs.
However, it occurs to me that in suggesting this course of action, I may unwittingly be coming close to encouraging Jenni to adopt a defensive attitude towards this problem.
So Jenni must consider her own behaviour against the four warning signs as well and finally, perhaps Jenni could give me feedback on whether this was useful advice or not to avoid accusations of personal defensiveness. Tricky thing, the ego.
Jim Bright is professor of career education and development at ACU and a partner at Bright and Associates, a career management consultancy. Email brightside@jimbright.com. For more workplace advice, see mycareer.com.au/advice.
First published by Smh.com.au on January 16 2010
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